


Holding the Bags

by Aurora_Novarum



Category: Stargate SG-1
Genre: 1000-3000 words, Gen, Humor, Season/Series 01
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2007-12-29
Updated: 2007-12-29
Packaged: 2017-10-04 03:01:05
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,419
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25213
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Aurora_Novarum/pseuds/Aurora_Novarum
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>A team shopping mall trip goes awry.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Holding the Bags

Samantha Carter juggled packages under one arm and her purse on the other as she reached for her cell phone. She blinked to adjust her eyes from the flourescent department store lights to the dimmer atmosphere of the shopping mall. When she'd last spoken to Daniel, the guys were in the "trying on" phase, but hopefully by now, they could pick a place to meet.

Still fumbling to dial her phone, she blinked in surprise when she recognized Colonel Jack O'Neill amongst the bored husbands and lounging teens on benches in front of the store. He was surrounded by several large bags from two menswear stores. She looked around, but did not see the rest of her team anywhere nearby.

"Sir?"

"Hello, Carter," he sighed and smiled at her. He looked...well, he looked exhausted.

"Where's Daniel and Teal'c?"

He waved a hand behind him. "Teal'c discovered that candle store down the way. Who knows how long it'll take before Daniel can drag him out of there." He shrugged with a too-innocent look Sam was starting to recognize. "Since I was holding the bags, I said it wasn't worth the risk of breaking something and volunteered to wait for you down here."

"How...thoughtful of you, sir." Sam struggled to school her expression into something diplomatic. From the colonel's raising of his eyebrow, she wasn't successful.

He chuckled. "Oh, I've done my tour of duty on this excursion. The 'Museum Store' experience was quite enough."

Now it was Sam's turn to raise an eyebrow. She waited for him to explain further.

"Teal'c spotted some of those overpriced knick knacks looking like old Egyptian dudes in the window display case and wanted to confront the store owner about selling false idols. It took Daniel doing some diplomatic two-stepping to calm T down. Of course, then Daniel got distracted by the book display when we were finally leaving, and Teal'c and I had to drag him out. Between the two of them..." He ruffled his hair and sighed. "They'll be fine. I'm sure Daniel can handle 'Yankee Candle' with Teal'c solo."

Sam suppressed a grin at the thought of Teal'c discovering the wonders of scented candles in jars. She remembered him using unscented candles for his kel'no'reem, but he had told her about some incense used on occasion and seemed to be fascinated with a lot of Tau'ri experiences. Who knew what his quarters would smell like the next time she visited.

She thought it best to change the subject and lifted her chin to indicate at the bags. "At least it looks like you guys were pretty successful."

To her surprise, O'Neill leaned back and scrubbed his face in his hands. "Oy. I guess you could say that. I really wish you had been with us, Carter."

She blinked. The guys were supposed to get Teal'c fitted with appropriate garb for official ceremonies on base while she looked for casual wear at a couple other shops. What had made the plan go awry? "When I talked to Daniel, things were going well. You'd found some suits that actually fit Teal'c and..."

The colonel rolled his eyes and flopped his arm down on one of the larger bulky bags. "Ah, yes, you called before the clearance rack discovery."

Sam didn't like the ominous tone in his voice, but she couldn't figure out what would be dangerous about a sales rack in a men's clothing store. She sat down on the bench next to him. "What happened?"

"Apparently, that control room technician–what's his name? Norman? Warren?"

Sam was bewildered at this turn in the conversation, but replied. "Walter, I think."

"Yeah, him. Well, last week he showed Teal'c pictures from his vacation. In Hawaii."

Sam continued to look at him blankly.

"Did you know Teal'c is amazed by the variety of dyes we have available? Apparently military fatigues have not given him the full range of our pallette. Daniel was fascinated by Teal'c's interest. Plus the store owner had bought too much inventory, so there were way too many Big and Tall menswear Hawaiian shirts."

He reached in the bag and pulled out a fistful of shirts, all with the distinctive bright colors and flowers. Sam ducked her head to stifle a laugh. "Hey, as long as it fits is usual my motto. But this expedition was supposed to get clothes to help Teal'c blend in here on Earth. These aren't the best camouflage."

"Maybe if we went to Hawaii."

The colonel appeared to consider that. "You think Hammond would buy that argument?"

"Probably not, sir."

He sighed again. "Yeah, you're right. It doesn't matter, Teal'c was in full stubborn mode, complete with eyebrow. He loved the shirts. I still wish you had come along. You might have helped, select...from this stuff." He dropped the shirts back into the bag and crushed it to his side like a cushion and looked about to collapse.

Sam wondered what made men assume all women had natural fashion sense. But she admitted to herself she would've done better than the guys. She made a mental note to return to make some additional wardrobe purchases, for Teal'c and maybe even Daniel too. He needed an update from college plaid. Maybe she could enlist Janet's help–she had great taste in clothes. In the meantime she had a tired and grouchy colonel on her hands.

"Well, perhaps some of my selections will keep Teal'c's mind off the tropical flower motif. I picked up some knit wear and a few different styles and sizes of jeans he can return if they don't fit."

She passed over the lighter of her bags. Belatedly, she realized Teal'c's clothes would be in the heavier one.

"Wait. That's actually the wrong..."

The colonel had already looked inside. He looked back up at her, his expression dangerously mild. "Carter. I thought you said you had personal errands."

Sam felt her spine straighten as she swallowed, not even sure why she felt guilty. "Yes, sir."

"This was why I went with Daniel and Teal'c instead of you. To give you privacy for possible 'girl stuff.'"

He made a random gesture with his hand and Sam felt her face redden, this time with annoyance. Girl stuff? Perhaps she should've made that tempting stop at Victoria's Secret as well just to satisfy his preconceptions. Wouldn't that just be following orders?

The colonel reached into the bag."You deserted your team–me--for this?"

He pulled out the Craftsman socket wrench set.

Sam shrugged, trying to make her voice sound cavalier. "I lost a few from my old set in the move. And Siler let me know about this great early bird special sale." Defiant, she met his gaze. "Do you know how hard it is to find a quality set with the right sizes to handle metric and standard? I've just got a lead on an Indian to fix up."

O'Neill looked bemused. "A..."

"Motorcycle, sir."

"Ah. Of course."

"I also fulfilled my mission." She reached into the other shopping bag and pulled out a few solid colored shirts and the pin striped button down she'd picked up on a whim. She had wondered if they'd be too bright for her stoic Jaffa friend, but now she realized they were probably too conservative.

O'Neill glanced at the clothes she held waitress-style in her hand, barely nodding his approval. His eyes drifted back to the Sears sign shining down on them.

"Carter, did you happen to notice if they have belt sanders on sale?"

"Uh, yes sir. Most power tools and the larger combination sets are marked down. That's why I went with this rather than just buying the individual ones I needed. They came with a handling case."

The exhaustion had now all but disappeared from O'Neill's face. "Power tools including some of the new cordless styles?"

Sam nodded. "They had excellent prices on the cordless devices."

He was already standing and gathering up his many bags. "Can you show me?"

"I-uh-sure. But..." She gestured down the mall corridor.

"Eh, Daniel and Teal'c will be fine. That's why they invented cell phones." O'Neill shrugged. "Besides, I passed a bookstore between the candle store and here. We've got a half hour at least. Lead on, MacDuff."

Sam smiled, stood, and rearranged her own parcels. She had decided against getting that cordless power drill/router set, but she took O'Neill's interest as a sign it was meant to be added to her workbench. "Yes, sir."

Fin.


End file.
